Dear Pituitary Gland,

Thank you for the way you normally regulate my hormones so well.  I know you feel under-appreciated, and I'm sorry I've never mentioned it before.  It has become so apparent over the past few weeks that I thought this letter was quite overdue.  You see, a few weeks ago, when I took birth control pills, the extra hormones made me slightly nauseous.  Not pregnancy-nauseous, but enough so to not want a bowl if ice cream at the end of the day, and you know I sometimes want (or need!) that bowl of ice cream at the end of the day.  Now I'm on Lupron, and after releasing all of my FSH and giving me a cyst, it has now suppressed all FSH production.  I must admit that hot flashes and headaches are not really my thing, and I'm sorry I never recognized how finely tuned your FSH production was, and how well you do at keeping all of these unpleasant symptoms at bay. I want to apologize in advance that next week you're going to experience an unpleasant onslaught of hormones, though I suppose you won't mind quite as much as my ovaries. After that will likely come pregnancy, which I realize is quite a journey for you too. So thanks for sticking with me and doing your job so well.  I promise I'll be more thankful for you from now on.

Me